Sometimes all you need is nothing...

Staying in pajamas all day, loads of knitting, a movie while the girls napped, zucchini pie for dinner, and not bothering to have the kids clean up. Yup. Sometimes you just need a day of absolute nothing; and it usually turns out to be everything you needed...

Autumn Days

 It feels as though our days have just become a muddled jumble of activities.  Not in a bad way; just a busy one.  I've taken care of friends' children a few days, which is always nice.  Leah loves her friends and it's so wonderful to see her play with them... learning new tricks on the playground and teaching in return.  I'm still looking so desperately for children to take care of and trying not to lose hope that they are out there somewhere.  We really need the money and I just wish I knew what to do...

Anyway, we've spent a good amount of time outdoors, and while we have had a few very warm days, the temperature is steadily falling.  Our hats are spending more time with us and I have "splurged" on some slippers for myself.  I stalked the windows all day long waiting for them today and I can happily say that I now have warm toes!  I'm trying not to turn the heat on, as I'm terrified of an oil bill, but I've had to twice now.  I think we might be able to squeeze a pellet stove in our house, and so this weekend may be a time to shop.

This weekend, despite Leah having a fall cold, we headed out to the farm to get milk, eggs, and yogurt.  We brought a picnic lunch and had ever so much fun greeting the animals, running through the corn maze, picking pumpkins, and visiting the cows.

Yesterday was Columbus Day, and so I watched the two girls that I nannied for as they didn't have school.  A local farm is usually only open on the weekends for pumpkin picking, but were open yesterday, so out we went!  We all had fun on the hay ride, took our time to find the perfect pumpkins (which I then carried back to the car; my arms were killing me!), then played in a hay maze, jumped on hay bales, and visited with more animals.

Today was a day visiting with friends, and I am just exhausted.  While I know that we should really stay home tomorrow, the idea isn't too appealing and I'm hoping to find some local walking trails.  There's nothing quite like going for a walk in the autumn, is there?  We shall see.  For now, I need to get my two girls ready for bed, then Kyle will come home, we can eat some leftovers, and I can knit and watch tv.

I will end with just one more picture.  There was a HUGE mama pig with her many piglets at the farm yesterday.  Call me an extreme breastfeeding advocate, but I just love to see animals nursing their babies!  It made me a little sad to overhear so many children wondering what the piglets were doing and so confused when they were told that the pig were eating.  How have we become so removed from nature?  At any rate, Leah was so excited.  "Look, mommy!  The piggies are drinking boobies!  That mama pig has A LOT of boobies!"  Ha!  It was certainly a sweet sight...

What I'm doing...

Enjoying autumn as I never have before...
Loving our new rhythm of going to the farm every week to buy our eggs, (raw) milk, and yogurt...
Running through corn mazes...
Prepping for the cold months ahead by buying new coats, socks, and slippers...
Knitting constantly with ever so much yarn...
Making Halloween costumes...
Wearing skirts that I made myself with plans for more...
Buying myself some much needed warm boots...
Visiting the creek...
Baking the very best pumpkin cookies...
Eating cold weather comfort foods, especially outside...
Accepting that it's football season...
Laughing at Elyse's new tricks, like standing on her own and putting her hands over her head when you yell, "TOUCHDOWN!"

What are you doing?

Visions of fall...

It's certainly beginning to look and feel a lot like fall around here!  The air has gotten cooler and the leaves are falling.  Slippers, hats, and sweaters are all making an appearance and I have to admit, I'm enjoying it.  This weekend was certainly one that screamed *autumn.*  We went to a local organic apple festival for the second year in a row and had a great time.  We got there earlier than we did last year to make sure we got some of the best apples!  It was a great time, and now I'm looking for the perfect applesauce recipe so I can start using them!

I also keep thinking about how I'm going to miss eating outside now that the weather is turning cool... and then I realize just how silly that thought is!  We've been continuing to eat lunch and dinner outside as often as we can, just the preparation is different.  Instead of just running out onto the porch, I'm getting the girls in slippers (realizing that I need to buy a pair and find a pair for Elyse as well!), and sweaters, and hats.  There's just something so beautiful about eating on the porch, listening to the crickets, and feeling the (now) cool breeze.  And then dinner ends, the girls jump up and play.  Elyse finds fallen balls from our sycamore tree to pop in her mouth while Leah does some crazy dancing.  Yes, I think we'll be staying out as long as we can.  Happy Autumn!

A good start

I'm not going to say that I woke up today and the rhythm I want just fell into place. I'm not. What I will say, though, is that I woke up (very tired), and a pleasant morning fell into place. I needed to shower and clean the kitchen (and other parts of the house that have been forgotten as of late), but I stopped, and decided that getting to the playground first thing with my girls was more important. So I threw on some comfy clothes, got us a bit bundled for the crisp morning it was, put Elyse in the BabyHawk and we headed out. It was perfect.

We went on the swings, Leah figured out some new ways to climb parts of the playground, and we just enjoyed.  The sun got warmer and warmer and before long, Elyse was fast asleep on my chest.  (Is there anything as wonderful as a sleeping baby snuggled up against you?)

After we were outside for about an hour, we headed in for a snack.  I then got a phone call from a lady who was interested in child care!  Things are looking up!  While I may not be the right fit for her and her son right now (due to money, etc), she said she would definitely keep me in mind for the near future.  At any rate, I may have a little boy to watch soon!  Also, another friend has started bringing her daughter for me to watch once a week or so.  It's not much, but it's enough to give me hope!  I don't know what the future holds, but this seems like a very good start, indeed...

Finding our Rhythm

I'm loving being home. While I do miss the girls I used to take care of at times, there is just nothing as wonderful as being at home with my children doing everything at my own pace. I love planning our days however I want. I love deciding on a whim that we're going to the park or the farm. I love changing our plans and being able to have an early or late night without worrying about the next day. I love having the time to take care of my home and enjoy it. But that's the thing. Time. Honestly, what mother is truly good at time management? If you are, by the way, please let me know your secrets! I think I've discovered that in a sense, too much time causes it to disappear even faster. And so here I am, at home, with time to clean and play and cook... and yet none of it is being done. At least, not in the way I'd like it to! I think my struggle now is finding a new rhythm that fits our new life. I also think that I, well... I think too much, get discouraged, and then just think some more. I've watched Leah and Elyse and tried to figure out what makes them tick. When are they hungry (other than ALL THE TIME, as they both seem to be going through growth spurts!), when do they need outside time, when do they need inside time? Planned activities, like painting? Free play? I work out a rhythm in my head, and then something happens: we sleep in. My arthritis is flaring up. The kitchen never got cleaned. And then my perfect rhythm is gone. And I get frustrated. So here's to figuring something out. I think that I need to *let go* and watch it fall into place. I think I need to put forth some effort. I finally started looking at my day BACKWARDS and I think that will help. I know that certain things need to happen by a certain time; think naps and bedtime. I'm building around that. And I know that if (WHEN) I find children to take care of, that rhythm will need some adjusting, but that's the beauty of rhythm vs. schedule, don't you think? There's room for change. So, we'll see. I'd like to be that organized mom that has everything under control. Maybe she doesn't exist, but I'd at least like to try.

Distracted

I've been working as a nanny for the past four years. Every day I drove to someone's house where I took care of two little girls (ages 14 and 35 months when I started). Fast forward, those girls are now in school and I have two girls of my own as well as a beautiful house. I ended my job at the beginning of the summer and enjoyed vacations and being at home with my own kids every day for the first time! Reality has set in, however, and I'm in desperate need of a job. My plan has been the same for several years and that is to find some children to care for in my home a few days a week. I'm looking to start a Waldorf inspired child care/play school, but am having no luck. I know that there are children out there who need good care, it's just a matter of finding them! So, that being said, I'm starting to get distracted. I have days where I'm fine with our current situation, knowing that everything will work out. Yes, I NEED a job, but I do feel confident that something will happen. Getting a job outside the home is not an option, so something HAS to work out. Nevertheless, I'm starting to panic a little. Our bank account is quickly being depleted and with no leads yet, I'm panicking a little. Here's hoping and praying that some sweet children are on their way to me soon! And so as not to leave this space on a nervous and distracted note, here are some pictures of my girls from Rebecca's wedding. It was a perfect wedding and, while I may be slightly biased, my girls were just the sweetest! Leah was a flower girl, but got a little nervous. She had ever so much fun after, though, and we all enjoyed the evening. The dresses ended up being adorable. The fabric I had originally gotten didn't work out and I decided that instead of freaking out I would just go buy some new fabric, plain old cotton, that I knew I could work with. They came out perfect. The skirt I made for myself turned out okay too (in the end), but almost killed me in the process!! Anyway, here are some pictures- thanks to my iphone as my camera battery ended up dying!

And one more picture, because it's just too cute! It has been raining here the past few days and my girls LOVE to play in the rain. Rain boots, umbrella, nothing at all... it's always fun!

A picnic dinner

Yesterday afternoon, as I finished cleaning up the kitchen from a baking endeavor, I decided to quickly pack up a dinner and surprise my girls with a visit to the creek and a picnic. Leah was very excited, and we headed off. There is a park about 5 minutes from our house and I can't believe we haven't frequented it more. With a quiet little creek, more rocks than you could throw, and a small playground situated on an enormous amount of grass, it's perfect. There's something about water that calls to me. At any rate, with Elyse on my back, Leah and I threw and skipped rocks, chased little fish, walked in the water, climbed "mountains" (rocks in the water), and ran back and forth along the bed of the creek. Then Leah wanted to run across the bridge and swing on the (very large) swings. I wanted the evening to be "all about her," in that, whatever she wanted to do when she wanted to do it. The only thing was... I wasn't expecting her to have SO much fun and forget about eating! I finally was able to convince her that we could stop and eat our dinner and then go back to playing.

Elyse very much enjoyed our picnic dinner! We then played some more, and with the promise of a popsicle (more on those another time) when we got home, we were able to leave. It was a beautiful way to spend an evening, and would have been made more perfect only if Kyle had been able to join us (darn work schedule!). Yes, I see many many more creek trips in our future...